Lisa Ricard Claro – Author

Romance is good for your heart!

Back Online Limerick and Wine. . .er, Whine

Posted on Dec 21, 2010 by Lisa Ricard Claro   24 Comments | Posted in christmas · internet · limerick
Clip art courtesy of Hasslefreeclipart.com

On Friday the unthinkable happened. My internet server, Bellsouth, experienced an extended outage and  internet access became impossible for—gulp!—four solid days. I could access neither my blog, email accounts nor Facebook. Due to appointments and such, a visit to the library or a friend’s house to borrow a working computer was out of the question.

So how did this internet junkie deal with being severed from her technological window to the world? I whined a lot and. . .er. . .wined, because let’s face it, no internet!  Hey, don’t judge me. I didn’t just sit around and swig from a wineglass, you know. I also ate chocolate and watched recorded episodes of the new Hawaii Five-O; and if you’ve ever seen Alex O’Loughlin shirtless you won’t ask why Five-O is my new Must-Not-Miss. Actually, now that I think about it, losing the internet wasn’t all bad. Just saying.

In honor of my return to the blogosphere I wrote the following poem, limerick style:
There once was a blogger who cried,
The week that her internet died.
She posted no stuff,
Neither serious nor fluff.
With technology she did collide.
When finally the techs got it right,
The internet beamed to her site.
She tried not to pine,
For all the missed time,
And the stuff that she nary did write.
(Oh, how I missed Microfiction Monday!)
So now she is back to her blog,
A veritable computer hog.
She’s still mad at Bellsouth,
β€˜Cause they shut her mouth,
With four days of internet fog.
The story is over, my friends.
But this lesson was learned at the end:
Your internet cherish,
Lest connection should perish,
And leave you with no blog to tend!
Thanks for sticking with me through the black hole of internet failure. I can’t possibly catch up with all the posts by fellow bloggers, and I’m sorry for that because I know I’ve missed some terrific stuff; but I’m glad to be back on board!

How do you cope with internet outages? Do you grumble, suffer in silence, or haunt the local internet cafes?

Loving my internet connection —
Lisa

24 Responses to "Back Online Limerick and Wine. . .er, Whine"

  1. Comment by Linda O'Connell
    December 21, 2010 at 9:07 am  

    I trekked to the library and sat next to crazies. We are so connected, aren't we? Love your limerick.http://lindaoconnell.blogspot.com/

  2. Comment by Oregon Gifts of Comfort and Joy
    December 21, 2010 at 10:10 am  

    Welcome back, Lisa! I was wondering where you were.

  3. Comment by Sioux Roslawski
    December 21, 2010 at 10:30 am  

    A hottie, Alex O'Loughlin,Filled Lisa with nothing but sin.No connection for her;Her mind started to whir…So she waited for glimpses of skin.She nibbled on cheese and drank wine,On a hunk, she wanted to dine."He is SUCH a not-miss,I'm not so much pissed…One more glass, I'll be totally fine!"But now she's connected once more.On Alex, she's now closed the door."Microfiction Monday!To my muse I will pray,That Bellsouth keeps working," she roared.

  4. Comment by Sioux Roslawski
    December 21, 2010 at 10:33 am  

    Lisa,I forgot to add this note to the brilliant (ha) limericks.Another blogger follows this blog, her Dec. 15 post is brilliant. A murder of a fish. It smacks of "The Usual Suspects" and of course, a cat is involved. I think you will enjoy it. Check it out. http://pearl-whyyoulittle.blogspot.comWe're glad you're back!

  5. Comment by Karen Lange
    December 21, 2010 at 10:51 am  

    Sorry to hear of your trials, but glad to see you are back. πŸ™‚ It is interesting how dependent we've gotten on this technology stuff. If I am away and busy I don't really miss it, but if I am home and can't access it, I'd be whining a bit too. Glad you also found solace in chocolate!

  6. Comment by Lisa Ricard Claro
    December 21, 2010 at 1:36 pm  

    Hi Linda – I never had time to get to the library. They time usage, anyway, so I would have been booted off long before I was ready to give it up!

  7. Comment by Lisa Ricard Claro
    December 21, 2010 at 1:39 pm  

    Hi Kathy – I'm glad to be back!

  8. Comment by Lisa Ricard Claro
    December 21, 2010 at 1:42 pm  

    HaHa!! Sioux, I love your poem, obviously written in my honor! I promise to live up to every expectation you set forth. πŸ™‚

  9. Comment by Lisa Ricard Claro
    December 21, 2010 at 1:46 pm  

    Hey Karen – Well, chocolate cures almost everything, after all. πŸ™‚ Having no internet is a little like being without the TV during a thunderstorm. I get a lot of other things accomplished!

  10. Comment by Carmen Myrtis-Garcia
    December 21, 2010 at 3:07 pm  

    LisaI'm glad chocolate and your favorite show came to the rescue. And welcome back online. It sort of freaks me out at times when I realize that my entire life depends upon the internet and my computer working properly (I teach four college courses online in addition to my writing). I choose to believe that as long as I send love and gratitude to my computer and the internet, all will remain well. :)Happy holidays,Carmen

  11. Comment by Bookie
    December 21, 2010 at 3:49 pm  

    You captured the angst of no connection very well!!! Now that we have it, we think we can't go on without it! Can you remember life with no keyboard or cell phone?!?!I have had trouble for near two weeks with the blogging. I have left comments on several and they don't show up. Probably the user here. But then as I type this, the words take several seconds to show up today in the comment area. Hope it goes!Thanks for you commentgs on my ow blog and I am glad you made it to Follower!!!

  12. Comment by Lisa Ricard Claro
    December 21, 2010 at 5:34 pm  

    Hi Carmen — I talk nice to my laptop all the time, but the Internet is an unforgiving wench. *sigh* She is fickle! I'm happy to be back up and running. Just hope it lasts!

  13. Comment by Lisa Ricard Claro
    December 21, 2010 at 5:36 pm  

    Hi Bookie – The old "can't live with it, can't live without it" phrase comes to mind. Most of us are so dependent on the instant access that it is tough to be without it. It was an interesting four days, I'll say that!

  14. Comment by Lynn
    December 21, 2010 at 10:38 pm  

    I'm having a hard time just reading things with having the internet. I'm thinking it wouldn't be all that bad, but I really don't want to be without it πŸ™‚

  15. Comment by Sally
    December 22, 2010 at 12:02 am  

    I'm with you on Alex and 5-O. I have never lost connection, knock on wood, but both my husband and son would be going batty first so, lucky me, the problem would be resovled before I joined them.

  16. Comment by Lisa Ricard Claro
    December 22, 2010 at 6:52 am  

    Hi Lynn – It is tough to "put it away," isn't it? Amazing how much time we spend at the computer, either writing or surfing. Scary.Hey Sally – You're lucky to have never experienced the black hole. It was not a fun four days!

  17. Comment by Tammy
    December 22, 2010 at 11:18 am  

    I panic and pace. Chocolate, wine and Alex O'Loughlin therapies are much better remedies! And your limerick is a hoot!!

  18. Comment by K9friend
    December 22, 2010 at 8:59 pm  

    It's amazing how addicted we are to technology. Recently, I had a problem with my audio cord that kept my computer silent and that nearly drove me up the wall. No telling what I'd do if I lost connection for four days!Patwww.critteralley.blogspot.com

  19. Comment by Lisa Ricard Claro
    December 22, 2010 at 9:25 pm  

    Hi Tammy – Yeah, I'll vote for chocolate, wine and Alex over pacing and panic any day. :)Hi Pat – Glad you got your audio cord fixed. Stuff like that makes me nuts,too!

  20. Comment by Debra Mayhew
    December 23, 2010 at 10:53 am  

    Loved your limerick, Lisa! And so glad you found a way to cope – however taxing the wine and chocolate must've been for you. πŸ™‚ When this stuff happens to me, I crawl out of my skin for a few hours then realize I could probably use the time to get caught up on laundry. Or else, I whip out a legal pad and keep writing!

  21. Comment by Madeleine
    December 23, 2010 at 11:52 am  

    Fabulously entertaining limerick. Sorry to hear your problems. I get days when my computer won't log on despite the router lights showing a connection! I empathise Happy Christmas :O)

  22. Comment by Lisa Ricard Claro
    December 23, 2010 at 7:03 pm  

    Hey Deb – I have to admit it is amazing how much is accomplished, writing and otherwise, when the internet is out!Hi Madeleine – Glad you like the limerick! Merry Christmas!

  23. Comment by Cathy C. Hall
    December 23, 2010 at 11:25 pm  

    Now, see? If you had internet, you wouldn't have come up with that brilliant limerick?

  24. Comment by Lisa Ricard Claro
    December 24, 2010 at 12:39 am  

    Hey Cathy – Huh. True that. I guess every cloud has a silver lining, as my Mama used to say. I just wish it hadn't been quite so silver, you know? Four days was torture!


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