Growing Out the Gray: Warning! Comes With Extreme Attitude!
Update on the gray grow out: We’re almost there, Buttercup! By March, the salt & pepper transition (mostly salt) should be complete. But it must be noted that it comes with a price, and I don’t mean looking old, although, yeah, that’s a real side effect. But no, I’m talking about the fact that the more the gray grows out, the less tolerance I have for bullshit. It’s as though my BS meter is on high alert, and my mouth stands at the ready with full servings of sass.
GAK! Did I just say all that? ME? On my G-rated blog?
Why, yes. Yes, I did.
Though my external editor works just fine, my internal editor has trouble filtering these days. The weird thing is that it appears to be in direct conjunction with the ever expanding gray on the top of my head.
My son was the first to note, “Looks like that gray hair comes with a feisty attitude.”
The hubster nodded, looking resigned and more than a little terrified. “You have no idea.”
I did some thinking about that theory—that my gray hair is affecting my tolerant and sunny disposition. 🙂
Here’s the thing. The gray reminds me that life is short—maybe a little too short to spend it biting my tongue—and that I’m closer to the end than the beginning. After a lifetime of being the diplomat, rubbing bellies, and dispensing warm fuzzies, I’m finally ready to just…not…once in a while. It really does feel good, even if it means popping off with the occasional F-bomb, a circumstance that arouses in my grown children a weird combination of horror and pride. Also, the hero in my second book, Love to Believe, has a potty mouth he’s trying to clean up…maybe I’m channeling him.
Of course, every time something less than sweet flows from my mouth I can hear my mother’s voice telling me, “People who swear do so because they possess a poor vocabulary.” This is one of the only things about which Mama was wrong, and her own occasionally colorful vernacular was solid proof.
Don’t misunderstand. The fine tuning of my BS meter doesn’t mean that I’m walking around swearing like a sailor. (Do sailors swear more than anyone else, really, or is that just a saying? Anyone? Rob, you ought to be able to answer that one. 😉 ) It’s less about calling people out on their BS and more about empowerment. I can’t say why. There’s just something about embracing the gray, about saying, “Hey, this is who I am, for real,” that frees the spirit and boosts confidence. Rather ironic, since I spent years coloring to achieve those same results.
Growing out the gray isn’t for everyone. My aunt, who is in her 80s, still colors her hair. She told me I’m brave to grow out the gray, and that is the comment I hear from women the most. I would argue that bravery doesn’t play into it. It was just a choice. I was tired of spending so much time dyeing my roots when there are a million other things I’d rather be doing, and it’s easier not to color. Call me lazy, not brave.
The hubster has started calling me his silver fox, and I get a kick out of that. This whole thing is a change for him, too, because aside from the aforementioned increased feistiness factor, he’s watching—over the course of only a few months rather than years—the fading away of my ostensible youth to reveal the true middle-aged me. A mere six months ago he had a dark-haired wife people often mistook for a decade younger than her actual age. Today? Not so much. With the brown fading to reveal an abundance of silvery salt & pepper, I look all of my 55 years, and probably quite a bit older. Kudos to him for being okay with that and making me feel good about it.
So now you know the Naked Truth: I’m a feisty old broad with a deep well of sass and a low tolerance for bullshit.
And also a silver fox. My husband says so. 🙂
Have you ever done something that manifested itself in ways you didn’t expect? And tell me the Naked Truth: What’s the status of your internal BS meter these days?
See you Friday for Observations from the Tub!
Romance is good for your heart! To purchase your copy of Love Built to Last in eBook or Print, go to Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Black Opal Books, Kobo, or AllRomance. Book #2, Love to Believe, will be available for purchase January 30, 2016!
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