Nothing but the Truth, So Help Me Blog!
Thanks to those of you who played my silly guessing game. The time has come for me to fess up. Here’s the truth:
1. Don Rickles – True! Driving in Vegas–where we lived back in the ’80s–Joe and I were stuck at a light. A knock at my passenger window startled me out of my skin. The knocker was none other than Don Rickles on a bicycle. He blew me a kiss, gave me a huge smile, and went on his merry way. As my dear cuz Jo pointed out, in Vegas, anything can happen!
2. Don Johnson – Dreaming! My hubby has known for 30 years that he never has to worry about me being unfaithful because I can’t even cheat in my own dreams. Being a good girl really bites sometimes…
3. Arrested in St. Maarten – Big fat lie!
4. Bunny hop in Vegas at the Union Plaza on New Year’s Eve – True! I may be a good girl, but I know how to have fun!
5. Department of Housing and Urban Development – True! The Las Vegas television station accommodated my battle with the government and within two weeks the house in question received a makeover, went up for auction, and I soon received new neighbors, a young couple with twin boys. It worked out for everyone, even the feds.
6. Snowflake tattoo – Big fat lie! Alas, I do not sport a tattoo either seen or unseen. Someday, maybe…
7. Childbirth without anesthesia – True! My dad taught his clients self-hypnosis for weight loss, cessation of smoking, and pain control. He taught me self-hypnosis to help with concentration during school exams, but it dovetailed nicely with my Lamaze classes. I delivered all three of my kids without anesthesia, and my last OB (a short, chubby, Filipino man whom I adored) declared: “Wonderful! You should have ten babies!” Yeah, easy for him to say. I stopped after three. (And looking back, what kind of noodlehead doesn’t use anesthesia during childbirth in this day and age?)
So now you know the truth about l’il ‘ol me. I’m a faithful, untattooed, self-hypnotizing, noodleheaded, bunny-hopping crusader who receives blown kisses from old comedians and has never been arrested. I also admit to a longstanding addiction to dark chocolate, QT toffee coffee and Lay’s potato chips.
Now you know all my deep, dark secrets. Shhh…don’t tell anyone.
‘Til next time –