Penguins are Cute, Right?
Today’s Naked Truth is another smorgasbord. I’ve been crazy slammed since the book release, and being down with that stomach virus caused a logjam. So, I’ve got a few things to share, and then I’m dashing off to mail the books to the contest winners, after which I will pack my bags in preparation for my beach trip. Yes, I am heading to the beach! Siesta Key, to be exact, for a book signing. I’m ready!
First, I want to complain about being postmenopausal. This life phase is not for sissies, Buttercup. Mama should have warned me about all this stuff. All she ever said on the matter was “Your boobs will get bigger.” This may not seem like a big deal to some of you, but as my boobs have remained practically microscopic my whole life, the promise of cleavage was something to look forward to. What Mama didn’t tell me was that as the boobs grew, so would everything else. And she remained mum on the gravity issue.
WTF people? I wanted a C cup, but I didn’t sign up for this.
In honor of my book signing on Siesta Key, Florida this Saturday (February 13th from 1:00 to 3:00 p.m. Be there or be square!) at the magnificent LeLu Coffee Lounge, I hit the stores in search of a trés adorable outfit. I don’t like to shop, so I don’t do it very often, and considering my career choice, I’m more likely to spend the day in saggy Levi’s and a sweatshirt than anything else—although I’ve discovered stretchy lounging pants, which may be sloppy, but I promise you, they’re divine, dahling. Anyway, the point is, when I say I don’t shop, you can take it to the bank. So, when I grabbed a bunch of size 6s and headed for the dressing room, I wasn’t expecting what I found. Yeah, inside I’m still a size 6. Outside? Uh, not so much. It was a disaster. I won’t even sugar coat this, people. My ass is huge.
But, I’m an optimist, right? So no worries. I skedaddled back out and chose a more agreeable size, careful to check for flexible fabric—spandex is like a miracle drug for cellulite—and marched back to the dressing room to try again. And I learned something important.
My saddlebag ass scrunched into spandex pants makes me look like a penguin.
I drowned my sorrows in dinner at Frontera and a glass of wine with the hubster, both of which might be a contributing factor to the aforementioned burgeoning butt (the dinner and the wine, not the hubby). I guess I shouldn’t complain. At least I have cleavage.
And now you know a bit about the stuff floating around in my brain. Scary, right?
Next up, if you have signed up for my newsletter, I owe you an apology. The January newsletter was lost in cyberspace, so the early information regarding Love to Believe and the book giveaway here on the blog never made it out. To make it up to you, I’m offering a contest only for newsletter recipients. I’m giving away four autographed copies of Love to Believe along with four of these necklaces, which I spotted at a favorite what-not store:
If you’d like to participate in the newsletter giveaway, sign up here (if you already receive my newsletter you may skip this step): I only send a newsletter a few times a year, so you won’t be spammed, and your email address is never shared. To enter the contest, all you have to do after signing up for the newsletter is comment here on the blog over the next week, and/or post about Love to Believe on Facebook or Twitter—just be sure you let me know what you did.
Next up, a reminder that the eBook of Love Built to Last is still on the Valentine’s special at 99-cents until the 15th. Tell your pals. 🙂
As many of you know, in addition to writing romance novels, I also write for a children’s educational market. My latest publication with Korean publisher, Darakwon, is this elementary grade book about inventions and inventors. Pretty cool, huh? I love seeing my work illustrated, and these folks do it right. I received my copies in the mail at the same time my print copies of Love to Believe arrived. Happy dancing ensued! (Now if I could just learn how to speak Korean…)
That’s it for now. Please sign up for the newsletter, and if you happen to be in the Sarasota area on Saturday, drive over to Siesta Key and meet me at LeLu Coffee Lounge. ButtonsMom will be there, too! By happenstance, she lives in the area. I’ve only met her once before, and I’m excited to see her. We’re going to have a fun time! (Even if I do look like a penguin.) 🙂
Have a great week. Once again, no Friday Observations from the Tub as I’ll be out of town, and no Monday Pawsitive Pondering either, but I’ll see you next Wednesday for more of the Naked Truth.
Thanks for hanging out with me!
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